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Apr 11, 2011

The Grad Student and the Fairy

A parable with Amazon Associate links.  ;)

One evening a grad student working on her Master's degree was studying alone in the library, nodding off over an impenetrable tome of postmodernist literary theory, probably something by Butler, when he heard a tiny voice cry out. Startled, he jerked awake. A very soft, high-pitched voice wailed, "Help me! Help me!"

He searched the stacks with increasing alarm as the tiny plea grew more desperate, then sputtered into a scream of pain.

At last he saw it...a big, ugly rat, dragging a little pixie girl by the ankle. The rat was as fat as the hardcover edition of Of Grammatology by Derrida, and the fairy as slender as a No. #2 pencil. No matter how she fluttered her translucent wings, she could not yank her leg free.

The grad student, quick of wit, grabbed  Sociology: A Down-to-Earth Approach off the shelf and knocked the Derrida rat smack between the eyes. The villainous varmint thus vanquished, the grad student lifted the fairy up and set her on the shelf between The Golden Bough and The Annotated Hobbit.

"Thank you, thank you!" she cried. She fluttered in the air and alighted upon The Judgment of Paris. "You have saved me and therefore I will grant you a most precious magick. I have the power to make you either the wisest man on earth, the sexiest man on earth or the richest man on earth."

The grad student thought long and hard. He was pretty tempted to go for sexy. But he was, after all, an academic.

"Please make me the wisest man on Earth," he asked the fairy.

She aimed her magic wand. Light burst everywhere and he had to close his eyes.

When he opened them, all which had been obscure to him before, he now saw clearly, without illusion and without bias.

"Damn," he said. "So I should I have gone for the money."

* * *

:)

In other words...I'll be busy with grad school this week, so I probably won't have much time to blog. Unless I choose to write blog posts to procrastinate doing my schoolwork. Like this post, for example.

Meanwhile, if you have a self-publishing emergency, try dialing this operator. When she asks you, "Which do you want more, sir? The prestige or the money?" just remember the Parable of the Grad Student and the Fairy.

12 comments:

Jimmie Hammel said...

Lolz, cute. I especially liked the reference to the wine tasting book. Your story was much better, more adorable and less war-starting.

I'd have gone with the money ;)

Tara Maya said...

Kudos for catching both references. :)

Taryn Tyler said...

That is an adorable story. Have an insight discovering time studying.

TheSFReader said...

Just a quick note the "Initiate" is beeing showcased at http://www.fourstarsandup.com/

Hope it gives you a boost ! :)

Tara Maya said...

Thanks!

bakil said...

As a professor I can relate to the grad student in your parable.

Good luck with your studies!


Author of "eBook Magic," which is available on Amazon, B&N, etc...

Nelson Souzza said...

The blog is very good!
Congratulations!
http://nelsonsouzza.blogspot.com

AimeeKay said...

Love it!
I'll remember it next time I'm given a choice to go with the money. :)

Tore said...

I loved the story. It was very cute lol. I love fairy tales. Tore923@aol.com

krysykat said...

I think it's really ironic that the grad student sat the fairy between a book about mythology and a book of information on a fantasy book.

Diana said...

I really like the end of this amazing story!!!

Lieder Madchen said...

Cute story! I wouldn't mind meeting the guy who went with sexiest man in the world... :)